But this post isn’t really about the Gap.
I recently was editing some web site and other collateral
content for a client, a personal and professional coach who is rebranding her
business. She is deeply talented, highly trained, and a superb motivator. I
would hire her in a heartbeat. However, some of the language for her web
content was just too blah, too bland, too pedestrian to reflect the inspiring,
transformative work she does with her clients.
For example, the word “awesome.” It’s one of those words
that is so overused that it has lost all of its meaning. It no longer has any
punch. Do people typically use the word “awesome” to describe a state of being
filled with awe? No. My eleven year old daughter typically uses this word to
describe a plate of mac n’ cheese.
My feedback for the client was: “ Don’t say ‘awesome.’
You’re better than that. Be better than that. (cut to Ryan Gosling telling
Steve Carell in ‘Crazy, Stupid, Love.’ to ‘Be Better than the Gap.’)”
In “Crazy, Stupid, Love.” Ryan Gosling’s character helps
Steve Carell’s character bounce back after an unexpected divorce. He takes
Steve Carell’s character shopping, encouraging him to shift from white sneakers
and “mom jeans” to stylish man-about-town. When Steve Carell’s character, after
a long and expensive day of shopping, balks at the price and style of new designer
jeans and says “Can’t we just go to the Gap?” Ryan Gosling’s character holds
Carell’s face in his hands, looks deeply in his eyes, and says “Be better than
the Gap. Be. Better. Than. The. Gap.”
Sometimes, you shouldn’t just use your default choice or
take the easy way out. Sometimes, you have to dig deeper.
- Do you really want to say “awesome”? Or do you want to say “inspiring” or “revelatory”?
- Do you really want to say “improve”? Or do you want to say “elevate”?
- Do you really want to say “unique”? Or do you want to say “singular” or “unparalleled”?
Notice which words you use over and over, and ask yourself
if you can dig deeper. As yourself if the words you are using are really
revealing the deepest truths about what you want to describe.
Be better than “awesome.”
Lauren
Brownstein has worked in the non-profit community for more than 20 years as a
fundraiser, educator, and program manager. She specializes in: helping grant
seekers develop meaningful partnerships with funders, crafting outstanding
grant proposals, and working with individual donors to help them make
philanthropic contributions that reflect their interests and passions.
Learn
more about Lauren’s fundraising and philanthropy work at www.pitchconsulting.com. Purchase
her e-book, Grant
Writing Quick Tips, and her audio file, Grant
Writing for Creative Souls, HERE.
